Alice Fox stood in the living room of her Cloverdale apartment, animated as she talked about the facial expressions of RCMP defendants in the court case she had attended earlier on May 31.
Fox had prepared evidence for the trial, which involved one of the four women who had taken part in prepared by former auditor-general Sheila Fraser on how the RCMP deals with harassment complaints along with Fox and two other former RCMP members.
For Fox, it was a 鈥渉istorical moment.鈥�
鈥淭hat鈥檚 the file that鈥檚 going to change everything,鈥� she said about the evidence she prepared. 鈥淚鈥檓 a part of that small cog in taking it out.鈥�
Sitting on the couch, listening to Fox go over the courtroom drama, was Fox鈥檚 friend Const. Sarah Brown.
Members 鈥渢ell her what they鈥檝e been going through,鈥� Brown said about Fox. 鈥淪he genuinely cares about other people. She wants to help them.鈥�
Fox has helped many officers struggling with the RCMP go through their files and develop strategies for dealing with difficulties, including helping Brown.
Fox 鈥榣ived to be a cop鈥�
Brown had known Fox when they were both in the RCMP. Fox worked in the Integrated Road Safety Unit and Brown in the Burnaby traffic unit as a breath alcohol analyst.
鈥淲hen I first met Alice [Fox], she lived to be a cop. And she lived to be a good cop,鈥� said Brown.
After spending a few years analyzing Fox鈥檚 two to four impaired drivers a night, Brown suddenly stopped seeing her.
鈥淚 didn鈥檛 know that she was off, I didn鈥檛 know what was happening,鈥� Brown said. She remembered seeing an article with Fox鈥檚 name in it. When she looked it up again, and discovered Fox was suing the force for harassment, Brown decided to reach out.
鈥淚 sent a Facebook message telling her that I have a lot of respect for her,鈥� Brown said. Then Brown decided to talk to Fox about her own troubles with the RCMP.
Brown was involved in a code of conduct investigation for her some of her actions as an RCMP member. Two of the charges against her were found to be untrue.
Fox 鈥渒ind of took me under her wing,鈥� Brown said. Fox connected Brown to members of the , put forward by former Const. Janet Merlo for women who were sexually harassed or suffered from gender-based discrimination in the RCMP, which at that time had not been launched. She introduced Brown to members of Veteran鈥檚 Affairs, and took the stand in Brown鈥檚 code of conduct investigation.
It wasn鈥檛 always easy for Fox, Brown said.
鈥淪he can only hear so much and then it starts to bring her own anxiety back,鈥� she said. 鈥淪he鈥檚 like, 鈥業 can鈥檛 talk about this right now, I鈥檝e got to not deal with this. You have to talk to somebody else.鈥欌��
But the work Fox did is what Brown believes kept her afloat.
鈥淚f I didn鈥檛 鈥� reconnect with Alice, I would not be here,鈥� Brown said. 鈥淚 would not have been able to handle what they were doing to me. There鈥檚 no question about that.鈥�
That dedication to other members鈥� cases is consistent in Fox鈥檚 relationships with women and men in the RCMP. Fox first met Janet Merlo, the RCMP member behind the women鈥檚 class action against the RCMP, through a Facebook group Merlo created for women facing harassement.
Merlo and Fox have become as close as two very different women can be. Soft-spoken Merlo is reclusive, working nights as a supervisor at the in St. John鈥檚. Fox swears like a trucker, and is a 鈥渢otal Type A personality,鈥� Merlo said.
鈥淏ut yet together, the friendship has just blossomed,鈥� Merlo said. 鈥淚t鈥檚 a unique dynamic, that鈥檚 for sure.鈥�
The first time Merlo met Fox in person was at the Vancouver airport, where Fox was waiting to pick Merlo up and bring her to court in 2013.
鈥淎 lot of the women were afraid to even be there in court, because they didn鈥檛 want their 鈥� face being associated with being part of the class action,鈥� Merlo said. 鈥淪o for Alice to just kind of put herself out there and be there by my side was very,鈥� she paused.
鈥淚t means a lot to me to know she was willing to do that even through she was still employed and 鈥� going through her own battle,鈥� she said.
At that time, Fox鈥檚 battle included working the RCMP鈥檚 internal harassment process. More recently, it has been learning her file was changed to a permanent 06 designation.
According to a by the RCMP External Review Committee, a permanent 06 designation means a member is 鈥渘o longer employable by the force in any capacity.鈥�
The options for the member are voluntary discharge or medical discharge.
Fox鈥檚 initial reaction was shock and hurt. 鈥淚鈥檓 going into the mental brigade,鈥� she said. 鈥淚鈥檒l be medically discharged. It means they鈥檙e starting the process of discharge.鈥�
鈥淚t鈥檚 in no one鈥檚 interest to have members on protracted medical leave,鈥� according to the RCMP鈥檚 on medically discharging members.
鈥淲e owe it to our fellow officers who rely on each other for support and backup, to manage our workforce responsibly. That is why we cannot, in good conscience, pay a full salary indefinitely to an employee whose health prevents them from performing duties within the RCMP.鈥�
Fox had been off for four and a half years on medical leave, and was paid a full salary during that time.
Even though she said the RCMP should have discharged her earlier, the notice still hurt.
鈥淥bviously you can鈥檛 be a police officer forever,鈥� she said. 鈥淏ut how do you let go of everything you loved?鈥�
For many RCMP officers suffering from post-traumatic stress disorder, returning to civilian work can be difficult. Merlo works predominately alone as a night supervisor and said she would struggle with ordinary interactions that remind her of conflicts in the force.
鈥淚 don鈥檛 think after my experiences that I could go work in a normal setting and work with people anymore,鈥� she said, tears choking her voice. 鈥淚 get stressed out at the grocery store because I鈥檓 in the line and someone鈥檚 giving the poor clerk a hard time.
鈥淚 could just snap 鈥� and yell at them,鈥� she continued. 鈥淪o I work a job where I work alone.鈥�
That鈥檚 not always the case, psychologist Jeff Morley said. Some people may get a PTSD diagnosis and never go back to work. Others can go on a graduated return to work. And still others can hop right back to what they were doing before.
Fox isn鈥檛 sure what her plans will be. But leaving the RCMP won鈥檛 be easy.
鈥淚鈥檒l tell you honestly, you can throw any dollar figure鈥� at me with a lawsuit settlement, she said. 鈥淚t鈥檚 still going to hurt.鈥�
But, 鈥淚 don鈥檛 need to be a police officer to help others,鈥� Fox said. 鈥淚 can do what I can do.鈥�
Both Fox and Merlo are still in the middle of their lawsuits, but they are brainstorming ideas for ways to help other RCMP members and people struggling with PTSD when settlements are reached.
Together, they might start what Fox calls the 鈥淛anet Merlo Foundation鈥� to help members or civilians who are suffering from PTSD. Merlo also mentioned the possibility of starting a company to investigate harassment claims for businesses and organizations.
But until Fox knows when she鈥檒l be discharged from the RCMP, and how her lawsuit will turn out, she can鈥檛 make any plans for her future.
鈥淚 laid my life down before God and said, 鈥業 can鈥檛 do this no more. It鈥檚 up to you,鈥欌�� she said, sitting on her couch next to her pug Homer, quietly snuffling in the background. 鈥淚鈥檓 just riding out God鈥檚 plan now. I have no control. I鈥檝e had no control throughout this. And I鈥檓 okay with that.
鈥淚 think,鈥� she added, laughing. 鈥淔or the next 10 minutes anyway, I can guarantee it.鈥�
This is the last in a series of articles on Alice Fox鈥檚 journey through the RCMP and her struggle with PTSD.
